anxiety

I've been dealing with anxiety for... pretty much my entire life.

To this point I have barely been able to find a way to resolve my anxious feelings.  I can contain them to a certain point and I have a lot of different coping mechanisms that I use, but I've been noticing for a while now that I can't calm myself anymore.

When I get stressed out or am feeling even slightly anxious about something I instantly feel nauseous. Then I start panicking, followed by hyperventilating until I'm faint and then usually crying hysterically.

I try everything from talking myself down from it, taking deep breaths, closing my eyes, talking about it... and nothing helps.

Do you ever have any of these problems? What do you do about them?

It effected my life before, but now it's getting even worse.  I feel like I am in this constant state of panic. It only calms down when I am asleep and as soon as I wake up it starts again.  I'll have a few moments of clarity everyday and that's it.

and when I'm alone things escalate even faster. Why? I have no idea.

and when I am with people I am usually alone in my mind anyway.

Honestly, I think my crazy schedule plays a large role in it.  Along with my lack of hobbies and free time as well as the lack of friend time.  My girlfriend lives 4 hours away, so it's not like I can just go see her when I'm feeling upset.

Right now my girlfriend and I are looking into moving in together in a month or two.  This means I'll be looking for a new job and completely relocating.  It would be great.

But I'm worried about this anxiety. It has a hold of me and it is not letting go.

Stressful!